When A Loved One Dies

When a death occurs in your family, you will be faced with many decisions during a very difficult time.  Please contact the Vicarin the first instance. The Vicar will work with you and your family to determine how to honour the life of your loved one. Funerals can occur in the Church with burials in the Church yard or in the crematorium.

We also have a dedicated bereavement team who will also get in touch with you to help you through this time and also provide pastoral care service after the funeral is over.

Funerals

From the moment you are in touch with us, throughout the funeral service and for as long as you need us afterwards, we’re here for you. Anyone can have a Church of England funeral, whether churchgoers or not.

When someone dies, we understand how difficult this can be. There’s so much to think about, but we can help you say your final goodbye in a way that really helps.

  • We will celebrate and give thanks to God for the unique life of the person you knew and loved.
  • We can support you, your family and friends before, during and after the funeral with friendship and prayer, understanding your sadness and loss.
  • And in this difficult time, our experienced, trained ministers can share a message of hope and comfort.

We’ll be where you need us to be

A Church of England funeral can take place in any one of these locations:

  • At any of our venues (All Saints’ Church (Scotby) or St John’s (Cotehill).
  • At an outdoor woodland or green burial site
  • In a cemetery
  • At the crematorium

Someone from the church will visit you to hear about the person you knew, and will go through all the details of the funeral service itself.

The Service

Wherever you choose to have the funeral, you can add a personal touch to reflect the unique life of the person you knew:

Arrival:
When the coffin arrives and is carried into the venue or onto the curial site, your choice of music may be played.

Remembering a unique life:
When everyone is gathered, a hymn may be sung. There is a time to listen to the story of the person you knew and loved. You, another friend or relative, or the church minister can do this. It may include readings, which reflect the character and interests of your loved one.

A message of hope:
The minister will speak about God’s promises – of the hope that death is not the end. You can choose the Bible reading for this part of the service.

Reflecting and remembering:
In a time of reflection, music can be played, or silence may be kept. Prayers will be said at this point too. There may be other ways you’d like to make the service unique. Photos, flowers, or items that had a special meaning can be included.

Saying goodbye:
It will then be the time for the farewell. The minister will pray, asking God to keep your loved one in his care, using words that have been used for centuries.

This may be a very emotional moment. It may be possible to have some special music played at this point. The minister will say a blessing and music may be played as the mourners leave the venue.

After the funeral 

Immediately afterwards you will be with your family and friends. But as the days and weeks go by, the church will also be here for you.

When the time is right, you may need to place ashes in their final resting place. The church minister can offer brief words and prayers specially for this.

Or it may be appropriate to have a memorial service. The church minister can offer brief words and prayers especially for this.

Or it may be appropriate to have a memorial service. The church minister will help you do what is best for you.

Anniversaries and special times like Christmas can be hard after a funeral. We hold services of remembrance for family and friends. Keep in touch with us to see when the events are planned.